The answer however is you are doing nothing wrong!
First off, lets talk a little about newborns. They are supposed to wake every 2 - 3 hours in those initial weeks to eat. Their stomachs are small and breastmilk metabolizes quickly. They go through many growth spurts in those early days too which makes them nurse more frequently because they are telling your body to make more milk. This is 100% normal and to be expected!
Usually around 6 - 8 weeks babies will start to sleep a bit better. Sometimes you will get a 5 or even 6 hour stretch. Congratulations, your baby is now sleeping through the night! Wait, what? Yes, for a baby sleeping through the night is considered a stretch of sleep longer than 5 hours. Many new mothers don't realize this. When they hear their baby should be sleeping through the night by 3 months they are thinking 10 - 12 hour stretches. Yes, some babies do sleep through the night for 10 - 12 hours at 3 months, however most do not.http://www.askdrsears.com/
We have already talked about the joys of sleep regression in our previous tip of the day. http://
But wait, your fiend Jane has a 3 month old that sleeps 10 hours, your friend Liz has a 3 month old who is up twice, and your have the baby that wants to wake up every 2 hours on the dot. What gives?
There are many factors in how a baby sleeps. There are many reasons a baby wakes overnight. Babies wake for hunger, for thirst, and for comfort. Personality can play a big role in how often a baby wakes and how "easy" it is to get your baby back to sleep. Some babies are high needs and need lots of comforting and assistance to fall asleep and stay asleep. Some babies will quite happily fall asleep on their own from day 1.
So what can you do if you are the one with the baby who "never sleeps"?
**Please note that we do NOT recommend full night weaning before the age of 1. Nursing overnight is very important in the first year as it helps to maintain your supply. We also do not recommend any form of CIO sleep training**
First off, set a realistic expectation for yourself. Realize that babies wake overnight and this is normal. Many studies have been done on baby sleep in the first year and it overwhelmingly shows that babies wake up at night! So just because all your friends say that their babies "sleep all night long" that may not really be the case.http://kellymom.com/parenting/
Start with good sleep habits early. You can't force your kids to sleep but you can help encourage them gently. In the daytime try and get exposure to light and the outside. At night at bedtime have a soothing bedtime routine that your baby will come to expect. this routine can be as simple as a short song and a story. And no, its never to early to start. You can adjust the routine as your baby gets older. Make the sleep area inviting for sleep. Keep lights dim, if you get a lot of sunlight consider black out curtains, play soft soothing music.
Try not to overstimulate or overwhelm your baby when bedtime is nearing. Stick to calming activities in the hour or two before bed. This can be harder with older kids, especially if mom or dad works and they get excited at night when the family is together again.
Make sure your baby is napping well in the day. If your baby isn't napping enough in the day this will throw off their overnight sleep. Remember that newborns need lots of sleep and can get overtired quickly. Most babies before the age of 3 months only really should be awake for about 1.5 - 2 hours before taking another nap. Try watching your baby closely for sleep ques to make sure that you aren't letting your baby get too overtired. http://www.parents.com/baby/
Evaluate bedtime. Is your LO going to bed too late or too early? Every family's schedule and routine is different however plan on your LO needing about 12 hours overnight (with 2-3 brief nursing sessions throughout the night being normal). So if you are getting up between 6 and 7am aim for bedtime to be between 6 and 7pm. Putting your LO to bed later in hopes of them sleeping better always backfires! A lot of moms feel like putting baby to bed long before they go to bed only means they won't get any sleep because baby will wake up as soon as mom lays down. Many moms have luck with trying a "dream feed" right before heading to bed themselves. So if baby goes down for the night at 7pm, and mom doesn't go to sleep until 10, try gently picking up baby and trying to latch baby on at 9:45. Most infants will nurse in their sleep and this can sometimes buy mom a few extra hours before baby wakes for an overnight feed. This is also helpful for older infants when they start to become easily distracted or during a nursing strike. http://www.kellymom.com/store/
Evaluate your sleeping arrangement. Are you cosleeping? Room sharing? Is your LO in their own bed? Some babies like their own space and their own crib. If your baby is in your room try moving them to a new space and see what happens. Some babies love the closeness at night of their parents and co sleeping can be a wonderful thing to help everyone sleep better. Please make sure to follow the guidelines for cosleeping safely. http://kellymom.com/parenting/
Many people will say that you need to "sleep train" your child to make them sleep better. Sleep training usually involves a form of cry it out that we as a group don't promote. As stated above there are many reasons that babies wake overnight. Adults wake overnight too most of the time. However when we wake up we can get up and get a drink or snack or use the bathroom, a baby can't do that. Trying to force sleeping for 10 - 12 hours a night before your LO is ready can also impact milk supply. Overnight nursing is normal and during a growth spurt important to help keep and boost supply!
******Important****** If baby is initiating long stretches of sleep on their own and they are gaining weight well and have good diaper output, then it is not necessary to worry about supply. Your body will regulate to your baby's needs and if he/she needs more sleep, your body will make plenty of milk for their daytime feeds. Long stretches of sleep initiated by sleep training are what cause issues with supply.
http://www.askdrsears.com/
You will also hear "don't let your baby nurse to sleep" and "don't nurse overnight". Neither of these will help your baby sleep through the night. In fact nursing before bed is very soothing and will help your baby unwind! Like stated above night nursing is vital in keeping supply up. On a personal note my oldest son was not nursing overnight by 15 months, however he still routinely woke up until he was 2 1/2. Night weaning does NOT equal sleeping.
Some great books to read to find out more about normal newborn sleep are "The No Cry Sleep Solution" and the Dr Sears Sleep book. Both talk about setting realistic sleep expectations and how to gently encourage your child to sleep better.
http://kellymom.com/parenting/
http://www.askdrsears.com/
http://kellymom.com/parenting/
